Funny about food

At dinner I couldn’t bring myself to eat the sausages so I ate mainly broccoli with a bit of mash. 

Around 8pm I started feeling a bit peckish so I’ve just wolfed down over half a decent sized melon. Without a plate or sitting down. I just stood at the counter / sliced and ate. 

Now I’m off to bed wondering if I can fit in shopping for more fruit tomorrow.

My iron levels and my platelets are low at the moment so I’m supposed to be trying to eat more meat but it’s quite a battle. I sympathise with vegetarians. You must always be trying to eat more spinach! 😃

I can’t avoid it any longer….

I’m going to have to buy a mummy mobile. The one thread of my pre-child life that I’ve managed to hang onto up until now is my car. It might not be everyone’s cup of tea but I LOVE my mini. It makes me happy. 

However, you just can’t get three kids and two adults in it. It’s not possible. Never mind all the ‘stuff’ that will be required for days out with a newborn, a three year old and a five year old. 

So, does anyone have any recommendations for a five seater car for me? 

I’ll just have to buy myself a nice little electric Mini once my mini’s fly the nest…..

A few things that nobody else mentions about pregnancy…..

So I’m assuming it’s just me.

Cravings, glowing skin, acne, lush hair, tiredness, sickness. All things that are well documented as par for the course during pregnancy. But I seem to have had a few extras that no one else talks about.

  1. An expanding nose

It’s not normally that big!
Yep, it’s true. My nose has grown!! Each time I’ve been pregnant my nose has gotten bigger. It gets sort of wider and fills out and I hate it. In fact, it has never really been the same since my first pregnancy. Instead it’s just sort of deflated afterwards and less rigid 😕🤥. Most embarrassingly my husband found out about my nose issues by coming across ‘pregnant nose’ in my google search history on our tablet.

2. Extra hair 

But not the lovely luscious stuff found on ones head. I’m talking about hair where you’d rather there wasn’t any. Each time I’ve been pregnant I’ve sprouted two or three thick, coarse, black hairs just bellow my belly button. And these hairs are sneaky. They don’t pop out until my belly has gotten to the point where I can no longer see what’s happening below my belly button. They are big and long enough for me to see in the mirror from the other side of the bedroom when getting dressed. They catch me by surprise when trying to work out if say a swimsuit is going to be acceptable to wear or not. 🕷.  The only answer is to pluck the embarrassing little buggers out but this is pretty tricky when you can’t really see them and they really don’t want to come out! Which leads me to my next point…..

3. Becoming more sensitive to pain. 

This seems totally unfair to me. At a time when you are about to deal with what may we’ll be the greatest pain of your life, your pain threshold goes out of the window.

When not pregnant I can happily go along and have my bikini line sugared. I can even have a Brazilian and be almost entirely totally defluffed front to back. But whenever I’ve tried to have even just a minimal tidy up whilst pregnant I’ve almost cried with pain. On one occasion of trying to brace it before a holiday, I just couldn’t hack it and ended up begging the therapist to stop. I was left lop sided but I really didn’t care.

It’s not just ‘down there’ either. My regular eyebrow threading appointment becomes torture too. This may explain to friends why my brows look soo dishevelled and overgrown at the moment. I can’t take the pain. Even a bit of light tweezing makes my eyes water.

4. Bleeding Gums

Not the cool saxophone player from the Simpsons but actual – all your teeth are going to fall out surely?! – bleeding in your mouth. My daughters stare at me whenever we brush our teeth together at the moment because of the blood bath that it is involved. They are convinced that i’m about to loose a tooth or two at any moment. According to my lovely dentist this is not at all uncommon and is caused by those pesky pregnancy hormones. This time they are making my gums more sensitive which is why they gush blood at the slightest touch. Very unattractive. Good job I’ve already got a ring on my finger.

5. Constantly wet pants

No its not a leaky bladder and nothing to do with amniotic fluid. I’ll spare you all the gruesome details except to say its all to do with your cervix producing a ‘plug’. Google at your own risk.

6. Fear whenever doing a poo

This may seem totally irrational to everyone else but its totally makes sense to me. Every time i go for a poo I feel a bit concerned that the baby might come out. Even if I’ve been eating my Shreddies and there is no ‘effort’ involved I can’t help but feel as though baby is going to be squeezed out into the loo. I’ve never really suffered with constipation whilst pregnant, touch wood, but if i did i think i’d be too scared to deal with ‘it’. Pushing a baby out feels a lot like pushing a poo out in my opinion and I’m now worried that I can’t differentiate between the two. My sensible, rational side assures me that there is no way that i’m randomly going to squeeze out a baby (if only!) but the crazy, slightly neurotic side of me still feels worried about it.

How do you mount yours?

I was determined to mount this flipping thing! No mean feat when you hate getting into cold pools and your stomach muscles have gone on their own holiday. Is there even a way to do it in a civilised fashion? The dismount was even worse and basically amounted to an ungainly belly flop! Plenty of folk were looking on at the crazy pregnant lady with bemused looks on their faces.

On exiting the pool I misjudged the size of my belly as I pulled myself up on my puny little arms. I scraped my belly button and underside of my belly and my pants came down. 

#pregnantpersonproblems

When sand is too sandy and water too wet

One of the things I find most difficult about being a parent is that you can’t always persuade your children to enjoy an experience and if they don’t like something there is certainly no persuading them put up with it for someone else’s enjoyment!I love evenings on the beach. It’s one of my most favourite things. Unfortunately my eldest daughter thinks that sand is too sandy and that the sea is too wet and that mixed together it’s all too much for her. 😬🙄. My dreams of playing games on the sand, relaxing with drinks and chatting on the loungers and dipping our toes in the sea lasted all of about 30mins before my eldest could no longer handle it and threw an almighty strop about sand on her wet feet. So all the photos look lovely- except the last one. 😆#holiday #peanutstopeople #kos #beach #daughters

Just the Mr and me

Wohoooo!!! Just dropped the squawkers off at kids club for their much anticipated Alice in Wonderland party so the Mr and I are free to eat dinner without 10million toilet trips, strops over no chips or not having the same. No tears over unavailability of a litre of ketchup, no having to catch falling plates/cutlery/food/children. It means peace. Maybe a conversation but maybe we’ll just sit there in total silence with big smiles on our faces whilst eating hot meals. 

Party for them = Party for us